How Many Adesuas’ Are There?
This year’s International Woman’s Day/Month 2025 was themed on #AccelerateAction; aspiring to speed up the changes we know must be made to build a more equal, diverse and equitable world. The vision is bold and admirable, but my question is — how can we measure such lofty intentions? How will we know when we get there?
If you asked twenty women what the IWD theme was last year and what progress had been made, I’d genuinely be surprised if more than 10% could answer in any meaningful way. With this in mind, what then are we celebrating? And the organisations that created “nice” content — what did they achieve? And if it’s simply just a celebration rather than a plan for advancing gender parity, what is the difference between International Women’s Day and an all-round celebratory day such as Mother’s Day? This International Women’s Month, I’ve been considering the following; When do we celebrate, when do we look back at what was achieved and how can we measure success? How far have we come? Where’s the data? In March 2026, what will have been accelerated?
Is accelerate just a buzz word? There are issues and for me, we need to debunk the societal norms around accelerating women — especially when it comes to Africa. Let’s look at the fabric of society in Africa, in our both nuclear and extended familial norms. If you’re a successful 50 year old business woman but without a family, that is [broadly] problematic in our society and we need to unpick what the blockers are; schools, Government, family. There’s plenty unfolding in the current news cycle to evidence the issues around blockers for gender parity and diversity in Africa.
But to become a successful 50 year old woman with a family, you have to look at what the enabling factors were — through a family lens. When I think of my wife, Adesua Dozie, I wonder, how many other Adesuas’ are there? I talk a lot about how technology is a leveller and how it creates access for many more, as well as enables companies to scale — but in terms of how we build our society, how we can scale her successes and platforms that she has worked hard to build and create for herself? How can we scale Adesuas’ so we are not only counting one or two a year? We need to scrutinize the supporting systems that men have and the community that enables them.
For example, I was reading a fascinating story on Zikoko about support systems in Africa and fundamentally, if you’re planning to be successful and have a family, your primary support system is your partner and family. It also has to be your Church, for equality. You can have an infrastructure system at work but if you don’t have that same supporting structure at home or in your immediate community, you’ll find achieving professional success much harder. If grandma says “oh you’re not successful because you don’t have children” — how are you going to be affected and/or inspired by this? You have to have the building blocks and go back to basics; if we’re going to measure success of IWD initiatives, we need to go beyond corporate environments and go back to basics to see what is happening within families too. What’s happening in the schools? What chores are girls doing over boys? Must we continue to propagate the stereotypes of girls washing dishes and boys washing the car? The answer to that is very short.
When I look back at my own family unit and my own parents, it was clear from day one that my mother was the boss. My mother had her autonomy from PGD and together, they were partners. Partnership means when someone is down, the other picks up the slack. Even in financial matters, my father never considered himself as the sole provider because he was the man; no, he collaborated with and was supported by my mother. They built their business and family units, together.
The importance and influence of representation
The term “you cannot be what you cannot see” is used to describe that a lack of visibility can limit aspirations and opportunities, particularly for marginalized groups. I think it also extends neatly to family units; I was brought up in a positive co-anchored partnership by my parents, which subsequently informed how I chose my partner in life, Adesua. When I met Adesua, I didn’t see a wife, I saw a partner. Someone who could build with me, not someone I had to only build for. I grew up seeing the mechanics of a successful partnership and how it benefitted all, so replicating this for my own family life was not a new concept to me.
Adesua and I have spent the last twenty+ years working on how we scale that to our own family — ensuring our children know how to navigate successful careers and family lives. And what I would love to see is a ripple effect with many, many, many multipliers. We cannot succeed as a society with one or two Adesuas’ being spotlighted every year. We need to scale the Adesua effect; at that point, we will be able to start truly measuring the IWD pushes, and for the purposes of this post, with the African context.
Controversially — let me also say this; sometimes men have to be man enough to take a step back and support their wives’ successes, maybe even to the detriment of their own immediate career or business goals. And that’s what a partnership is; understanding that the wins you can celebrate are not always wins you have actively competed in or led on. Your partner’s wins are part and parcel of your partnership. You are both stakeholders in the partnership — and how often do co-stakeholders win, collectively and at the same pace, all the time? There is always a give and take.
Once we understand the give and take, we can harness it and start truly measuring the impact that IWD should have. And the best byproduct is that we unleash many, many, many more Adesuas’ into the world.
